Thursday, August 18, 2016
We’re back at the Matara Complex, having gotten in late last night. We’re all just laying around right now, relaxing after our tour. Betra and Oses are watching some violent game called kurble on the vid. They’ve set a wager since they’re fans of opposing teams. The winner gets to do rude things to the loser in the transport’s pleasure club when they’re under way again. Right now Betra’s team is ahead by two scores. He’s grinning ear to ear and Oses is growling.
Anrel is playing on her cushioned floor mat, chewing her colorful toys in turn. Every now and then Betra, who is also laying on the floor, picks her up and has her swoop through the air the way she loves. Her giggles make us all smile.
I’m doing my best not to dwell on how fast the time is flying past. I’m hanging out on the lounger, editing vid of our trip for the guys to keep and enjoy. A few minutes ago I tried to com Candy, completely forgetting she’s off with Nobek Stud Man. I wonder how that’s going.
Two more days. Damn it. I hate that they’re leaving so soon.
Betra’s com just went off. It was his mother. We’re all to get together for a farewell dinner tomorrow. Anrel and I are to be there or else, she says. Or else what? Betra gave me a frightened look that may or may not have been a joke and said, “You don’t want to know.”
“Just tell me we’re coming back here for goodbye sex,” I said. I can be a demanding woman too.
Oses grinned from his seating cushion. “I will even if Baby Boy over there has to stay with his mother.”
“I’m coming back here.” Betra made a rude gesture at the Nobek and then groaned as Oses’s team scored. He made Anrel fly again to make himself feel better.
Another chapter is ending. I hate saying goodbye. I hate it, hate it, hate it. This has to be the last time I get attached to men I can’t have. My heart can’t keep breaking like this.
For all the pain, I wouldn’t have traded a second of it … well, except the parts that included Little Creep and the It. But even then, I had Betra and Oses. Wow, the things they saw me through. Those two men were worth all of it.
As I look at them now, I think of how grateful I am to have known them. To get to continue to have their friendship even if we aren’t destined to remain lovers. It hurts for them to go, but I am a lucky woman to have been with them for any length of time. I may be the luckiest woman to have ever been born.
No, I wouldn’t have traded the last nine months for all the gold of Kalquor. They are worth every tear I’ve cried and will cry.