I told Candy and Katrina about my wild romp with Betra. Katrina, true to form, cheered me on. “How was he? He is so delicious looking,” she enthused.
She gave me a long, searching look. "How are you with this unexpected romp? I doubt you've gotten over Clan Dusa, Shalia. You've been carrying that torch with so much angst, I'm not about to believe you're letting those boys go."
It was a bit odd to have Katrina turn serious about sex. My heart warmed at her obvious concern. "I don't know where my head is precisely," I admitted. "I'm trying to do the right thing, especially where the baby's concerned. That's assuming I decide to have it. I'm still sorting it all out."
"How do you feel about Betra?" she prodded. "That's important too."
"I'm not head over heels, if that's what you're asking. I like him. He's a sweetheart, and he deserves a little happiness, since it looks like he will never join a clan. Although I'm not quite sure he's going to find anything remotely near joy with me," I added a bit sheepishly. Poor Betra could do a hell of a lot better than my messed-up ass.
There was a note of warning in Katrina's tone. "Shalia, he's not clanned with anyone. You cannot fall in love with another one of them that you have no chance of keeping."
I blinked at her in surprise. "I don't plan to fall in love with Betra. That's the last thing I want. I think my heart's been shredded enough."
"So long as you keep that in mind." Katrina smiled a little sadly. "You remind me of my youngest daughter with your relationship troubles. When she first dated as a teenager, the world ended and began again depending on whether or not she was breaking up with a young man or finding someone new. You have that same tendency to ride an emotional rollercoaster."
I sighed. "As a teenager, huh? I guess I'm a little behind."
"How much did you date back on Earth?"
I shook my head. "I didn't. The first time I was molested, I was only fourteen. I never trusted men after that, and they seemed to go out of their way to prove they weren't worth the effort."
Katrina shook her head. "No wonder you're such a mess when it comes to relationships. You're just now having your first experiences. Chin up, sweetie. You'll figure it out. Just give yourself time. Oh, and don't fall in love with Betra. Fuck him silly, but don't give him your heart. You'll just end up hurting all over again."
Sage advice from a wise woman. I have vowed to follow her sensible warning.